If you’re among the living then you know that The Walking Dead returns tonight at 9pm east coast time (about a half hour from now, eeek!). Many people are excited, including myself. I guess this post might include spoilers from the last season, so I I guess don’t continue if you don’t want to know anything from season three.
I’ve decided that this post will be a list of a few of the things I hope to see in the upcoming fourth season.
1. Desperate Walkers- so it’s been what, about two years since all hell broke loose? We don’t know all that much about the post-apocalyptic walker-world that’s been explored in this series but one thing seems apparent: food is running scarce. It looks like there are less and less people in the ten-square-mile universe that we see in The Walking Dead so that means that there are less people to eat. I don’t only want to see desperately hungry flesh-eaters ready for the kill, I want to see old-ass walkers that are both decrepit and decomposed. It only makes sense in a long-term undead story.
2. No More “Searches for Sophia” or Rick Freaking Out- I know every story needs character development and both Sophia being dead and Lori getting ate were fountains of development but come on, we’ve had enough. By the third episode of season 2 nobody cared about Sophia and although Rick went on a walker-killing tear post skanky-wife death it was mostly off-screen and therefore unsatisfying. No more searches, no more bullshit, just some straight-up badassery from everyone’s favorite undead-killing former sheriff.
3. More Than One Black Dude in the Crew- I’m not sure if anyone’s noticed, but black guys don’t have a very long shelf-life in TWD. In fact their shelf life is about as long as it takes another black guy to join the Crew. I think we’re currently on T-dog 3.0 and I kinda want to see this incarnation stick around for a bit. From reading the comics I know that Rick and Tyrese become bffs for awhile but since the show takes massive liberties I’m curious to see what they do with this relationship.
But seriously: how many professional sport franchises are in Atlanta? You’re telling me none of the dudes from the Falcons or Hawks were around when shit went to hell? There’s definitely gotta be a few professional athletes just destroying walkers right now. You’re telling me Kobe isn’t beasting through L.A.? Or that LeBron isn’t fucking hoards in Miami? Give me a break. I want to see a hobbled but effective Roddy White merking dicks this season. And I don’t mean in the NFL, because that’s not gonna happen.
4. More Merle Dixon. Wait he’s dead? Shit. He at least went out with a bang right? Oh he took out a bunch of the Governor’s dudes and almost got the big bad before going out in a blaze of glory? Damn I guess I’ll take that, he was the baddest of asses, cutting his own hand off and all to survive. Wait the Governor allowed him to get walkerfied? What a twatknocker. And Daryl had to re-kill him? Heart wrenching. He was easily the best character and provided the most natural depth to the show but the writers decided to off him anyway. He could do more with one hand and a dagger than most can do with all of their limbs. I would have liked to have seen what the group dynamic consisted of with him going forward, especially given the dichotomy between Rick and Merle’s history and Merle’s obvious status as an asset to the group. C’est la vie I guess. In that case. . .
5. More Daryl- This crossbow wielding badass is a fan favorite and definitely needs more killing and awesomeness this upcoming season. Plus he looks like this:
6. More Maggie, and I Guess Glenn too- Our favorite post-apocalyptic couple. What are they trying to do now that they probably care more about their respective well-beings than the group as a whole (besides papa Hershel who’s looking more and more like a gimped Santa Claus (By the way how’s he going to fair when shit hits the fan?) ) Oh plus Maggie looks like this:
7. Maury Povich- You can’t tell me you’re not still wondering who Judith’s baby-daddy is. We’ll probably never find out, but if anyone can it’s a walker Maury Povich.
8. Michonne- Katana. And if they go anywhere close to her story from the comic it gets cray. That’s all I’ll say.
9. The Governor’s Demise, the End of the Prison, and Whatever this World has in Store for Our Survivors- Now that the Governor’s officially gone to the crazy side by mauling a group of his own peeps I’m curious to see what other atrocities he has in store for the prison group. He straight up assaulted the prison in the finale, easily expending at least 3/4s of the season’s budget.
How long can Rick and the others last in the prison now that its security has been undoubtedly compromised. My guess is not that much longer. Not to mention all of the useless townies they’ve taken in. A few episodes earlier they weren’t even willing to take in a hapless hiker but by the finale they’re down to bring in the whole town of Woodbury? I get it, strength in numbers, moral high ground, blah blah blah. The only thing these people can do is die and become walkers. That isn’t going to be fun.
Where are they headed after this prison? Who’s going to make it? Which brings us to. . .
10. Crazy, Unbelievably Shocking Deaths- they say that anyone is fair game for a gruesome TWD death but so far that hasn’t really been the case. Despite what the writers say, the people who’ve been eliminated in TWD certainly seem to be due to popular demand. Everyone’s hating on Lori after the end of season 2? That’s it, you’re getting ate after childbirth. Andrea’s being a dumb, easily manipulated twat for the whole season? Lets tie her up and have her completely unable to get some pliers with her feet while Milton is clinging to a thread of life and then have her die from a bite from a single walker, which she’s been shown to be proficient against. With the cast that’s left who are we willing to let die? Carol? I don’t know, I like Carol. Plus Daryl does, and we don’t want to see him cry again. Beth? I don’t know, it seems wrong. Plus she’s gotta take care of the baby. Herschel? Seems plausible given the lack of leg but I know I don’t want to see him go. I’m sure we’ll get some surprises, here’s to hoping all ya’ll’s favorite character makes it.
So you’ve just read a bunch of things I’d like to see. Have your own expectations? Things you want to see happen? You can let me know in the comments. Want to discuss the start of season 4? Lets do it.