I’ve been interning at the zoo for over a month now and have been driving every day. It’s always been a dream of mine to be a mass transit commuter and feel like a grown ass woman. It’s a surreal feeling when you’ve successfully gotten from point A to point B by yourself. I live 10 minutes from a T stop (train station in Bostonian) and have Google mapped my travel possibilities multiple times. I’d have to wake up an hour earlier to make up for the hour commute, but I’d be saving money and helping the environment and all that crap.
Last week I set a goal list of 25 things to do before I turn 25. I have until September 19th to accomplish everything. Obviously take the MBTA was on the list as extra motivation to try it. The only reason I haven’t taken mass transit is because I’m afraid of confusing directions on a bus.
So I have a few fears: getting eaten by a shark in a swimming pool, getting killed by everything in Australia and failure. While the other two fears are self-explanatory, failure includes getting an answer wrong when called on, giving presentations unprepared and just getting things wrong in general. Taking public transportation escalates this fear because I’m afraid to get lost…aka fail. I’ve taken an NYC public bus once in my life and I was with a friend. College shuttle buses don’t count, sorry Oswego, but they were appreciated. The directions on Google Maps seriously confused me which was enough reason to hold off.
Today, on April 14th 2014, I went for it.
The T was like any other crowded train or subway. Unfortunately, the station near me gets incredibly crowded so I couldn’t sit as I’d hoped. I was planning to read on future trips like the true literacy snob I am, but that may not be possible, especially when you end up inches from a rotund man’s shirt buttons and have to listen to him sniffle as if his snot faucet was forever turned on. It was horrible. And sounds like that are one of my biggest pet peeves. Take medicine, blow your nose, problem solved. There is no reason you have to audibly conceal your snot from the world.
I’m not sure if commuting like that was worth being exposed to disease and squished to save on gas and well, the environment, too.
Fortunately, a majority of my car exited at a stop far enough away from mine that I could sit and relax. So I did. That made up for the first half of the T. But then some guy standing in front of me was weirdly talking to himself. At his stop he murmured, “I have arrived”, and left.
The next step was where my anxiety sets in. It wasn’t as bad as I anticipated. The bus stops are all located outside the station and all you do is stand in front of the one you want to take. Duh. Not sure why I thought there was more to it than that. I didn’t even have to wait for a bus. An out of service bus was headed in my direction and the MBTA employee corralled me in. He could tell I was nervous and was very upbeat and basically made me feel ridiculous for being afraid. Now that I got a Charlie card (Metrocard in hard copy form) all I had to do was tap it against the money thing and sit down. For some reason I was terrified that the bus driver was going to be some cranky old man that hated his life and rush me to my seat with his grumpy old man face. I just didn’t want to hold anyone up. Again, to my delight, the bus driver was also super friendly! He let me know when my stop was and told me where to go to come back to the station. Basically he’s my new best friend and we’re getting drinks tomorrow night. Be jealous.
While the ride to the zoo was lovely, the ride back was not.
I attempted to get on a bus that decided it was going to go out of service and not take me to the train station. Bitch. That was another 20 minutes I’ll never get back. How can a bus do that? Ruined my day, bus driver. He would probably steal 30 bagged lunches. Then, the bus ride took F-O-R-E-V-E-R! Endless stops and people just getting on and off. Didn’t they know my commute should not exceed one hour? Rude. The other commuters were helpful though. Almost got off at the wrong stop, as I predicted, but was quickly corrected and remained in place.
If I take the T for no other reason than to stare at cute guys’ butts, then so be it. Yes, I check out butts. It’s a hobby. It can be argued that girls have nicer butts than guys, but they can’t compare to a cute lil’ man tush. What’s even better is if that cute lil’ man tush is rockin’ a sweet pair of shoes on his (hopefully) big man feet. Obviously with a nice pair of slacks or sexy dark wash jeans to match. If you match any of these descriptions, tweet me @tobyjaye19 and I’ll hunt you down. Wait, tweet me OR I’ll hunt you down. Even though I won’t know who you are. Damn it, foiled again.
Any memorable experience with your mass transit commute? Let us know!
Happy Passover to all and to all first born Egyptians have a good night!